Drawn to a Larger Scale

     When you are growing up in a town like Ridgewood you are usually too young, and no where near reflective enough, to understand why so few people return to raise a family in Ridgewood of their own after they graduate high school. It's easy now to say how expensive it is and that the taxes can only be afforded by the truly wealthy, or at least a two salary family. Since I grew up in a one salary family and am not a person with an old Wall Street salary the idea of settling down in Ridgewood never really crossed my mind. Though there can be plenty of other perfectly fine reasons like wanting to experience life in other parts of the country or the world. Don't get me wrong, Ridgewood is still a nice place to live in and visit, but I put the idea out of my mind early on in my twenties of ever living there when I started doing the math and ascertained there was a probable need for two incomes to pay the freight. My ultimate rational being that if I was going to raise a family in Ridgewood I wanted it to be one I could recognize, and one which would have at least one parent at home. Call me old school if you like. It just came down to wanting a similar experience, not exactly the same, to what I had while growing up. 

      I reasoned if I couldn't do it based upon my expectations then I figured there were plenty of other ways to lead one's life. For the record I am happily ensconced in Forest Hills, NY with no regrets as to never having had a second act in Ridgewood. Second acts in life are rare to begin with, and many people make themselves unhappy by trying to top themselves by attempting a return to familiar surroundings, even if they do it unconsciously and with no desire to do it better or the same. I actually lucked out by moving here to Forest Hills after I was married (in Ridgewood as a matter of fact). It took some soul searching but it dawned on me that I would have felt a great regret if I had never lived in New York City on my own. I may have been borne in Manhattan and had numerous opportunities to crash in my parent's apartment in Greenwich Village during my college days, but these wouldn't have counted in my mind as having lived in New York City. My wife and I have been here for over eight years and we still delight in the energy and happenings of this city. We understand that this sort of life is not for everyone, but neither is the life found these days in Ridgewood. Both are good, they are just different. It comes down to understanding what is the proper sort of scale and proportion you'll feel comfortable living in and then going out and trying to make it happen. This is the sort of life lesson you can tell to an adolescent but until they are confronted with their own set of choices they won't really understand. One can easily say that much of life is like this, and after a while, if we have adjusted well, we come to accept it.