Wondering Aloud

I wonder aloud very often in this blog about who I was many years ago. It's probably closer to the truth to say I wonder about who I am today in light of how I remember growing up in Ridgewood in the 1960s and 70s.

This kind of reflection is not unusual for someone in their early 50 such as I am now. We are all such experts in the particulars of our circumstances that I would be remiss if I couldn't offer some bit of expertise for posterity.

I readily admit to having paid attention while growing up in Ridgewood. I had all the basics provided for me by my family which allowed for a careful observation of the shared values and beliefs of those living in Ridgewood at the time. Not to mention I was lucky enough to live in the same home throughout my K-12 school years. It wasn't until we moved away from Ridgewood that I understood the wisdom of having a homestead where well worn rituals are acted out and their significance is regularly reinforced by proximity.

This is all fairly commonsensical and I am sure many other people have concluded as I have that a vagabound life is in many ways inferior to one which is more physically and emotionally grounded. Though at the time of one's graduation from high school the world looks bright and promising. We are told to go explore and see for ourselves the places we have been only reading about for years. This is accepted as being the wise thing to do and most everyone follows this path to a more or less extent.

I wonder how it would have been if I had followed a time honored custom and had chosen to live close to my parents in the same town, or had bought their home when they decided to retire? Ridgewood taxes and expenses make this a fantasy for most people, and a scant few folks spend time away then move back. It's sorta sad that is how the town has evolved because we lose so much that can never be restored when we uproot ourselves and seek fame and fortune elsewhere.

The question I wonder about is whether the loss of shared values and a sense of community that we discard upon graduation day is more often than not returned to us in kind by the life styles we later lead and the communities we help grow and promote?

I have no conclusive answer to leave you with. All I can say is that with each successive post I appear to myself in a somewhat clearer focus, as paradoxical as that might sound. Even though with each passing moment I move further away from the fond moments I am trying to remember. My hope is to be able to continue with my recollections about a time long gone, the thought-filled wondering, and what it all means to me today.