Shattering Norms

As the glow from our 35th Class Reunion slowly fades from my imagination I am beginning to understand why we have reunions and why, more importantly, that people, in some cases, travel a great distance to attend them.

Reunions shatter the normalcy of our lives by placing us back among people who we may not have seen for quite some time. These events also give us a chance to see friends we have stayed in touch with and notice how they react to the folks re-entering their lives for what is usually a New York minute.

 In my opinion, the people who organize and attend reunions have come to terms with their high school days. They realize that whatever once happened they are safe now to be among their friends and classmates. It dawns very quickly on people that the time spent at a reunion is short and the contacts made so brief that it's over before we know it. What's more, the memories of whatever some people might have inadvertently or foolishly done a long time ago don't matter.

 It's not that reunion attendees have forgotten their past or still don't feel the sting of some slight. No, they have only buried for the time being their memories of youthful indiscretions and unrequited passions. This allows them a fleeting moment to consider what might have been and also what has come to pass.

I truly missed the folks who didn't make the reunion or couldn't for a very good reason. My sense of loss is felt more keenly every time I think about how much we put into these reunions. Not only the organizers but the people who muster up the courage to be present, especially those who decide at the last minute that this event has to be attended. The last minute types were some of my favorites. (Even if they were consciously crashing the event and hadn't bought a ticket!) The last minute ticket buyers were all so apologetic about not making their minds up sooner, and after the party was over even going so far as to gently admonish themselves for even considering being a no-show. No apologies were necessary in my mind, and the self recriminations were completely unnecessary. I just noticed how happy they were to have faced down their fears (real or imagined) and had taken to time to show us all how they were getting along. That's really all reunions are about: taking time out to acknowledge what we once were and will never be again; spending time with fellow alumni who you might never see again; and hopefully coming to some understanding as to how important it is to change things up and break our old routines. Nothing quite like a reunion to get you out of a rut. It might even help set you on a course more favorable than the one you were on or couldn't have possible imagined without the assistance of a night of reminiscing with old pals.