Never Waste a Good Exit

Saying your goodbyes whether they are the last day of a job, at the end of a party, or to someone you know who is dying, are never easy to make.

Saying goodbye is toughest when you don’t know if you are ever going to meet again, if you are ever going to say hello again.

Have you ever told someone you admired them and then never seen or heard from them again? I have done this out of a sense of gratitude for an example someone has set, for something I have seen them do when they thought nobody was looking, and just because I knew it would brighten their day. I expected nothing in return and reaped the rewards of feeling you are living an authentic and honest life.

True friends don’t say good-bye, they just take extended leaves of absences from each other. Another way of looking at our forthcoming 40th Reunion. If you attend you will be able to say you were there.

Moving on is much simpler than all that you leave behind in terms of friendships. Come to the next reunion ready to make your exit, while at the same time anticipating all the coming entrances you could make in the future.

Hello, 2017!

https://www.maroonsonline.com

Laughing At The Past

It takes a strong disposition to laugh at the human condition. We witness good and bad everyday of our lives. We experience good and bad everyday. There is no avoiding it.

It takes all of our energy and attention to keep our attitude, our mood, from bottoming out. This is important because we want to be around when things gets better.

When we were in high school that was the sum total of our lives. Then we grew older, hopefully wiser, and came to our own conclusions.

One day we might even realize how close the meaning of Life resembles the time we spent in high school. Yes, that time when all of our attention was focused on what was immediately around us, who was around us, and what they said and did.

It dawned on me today that at all times and everywhere no one forgets where you came from and no one forgets who you are.

Might as well concede that we are all in it together.

My suggestion is to find a time to visit with those people who knew you when you were young. Do it before you grow much older. Take the time to laugh at what you did together, how you
felt, and what you experienced since those days.

Find some time to laugh with your old allies from high school. We are working hard as I write to produce an event where you will be able to laugh at what occurred in the past. There will be familiar music, good food, and a pleasant outdoor setting in the middle of July.

Save the date: 22 July 2017.

How-To Maintain Hope In Our Lives

The Sufi mystic Rumi writes about how we can all maintain hope in our lives : "Look as long as you can at the friend that you love.”

These are strong words and do not come gift wrapped. Hope never is easy to maintain but it wouldn't possess such restorative powers if it did.

So whether you plan on returning for a RHS Class Reunion or simply return to your old yearbook, stare hard at those old friends. Some you will never see again, some you will intend to see but won't, and some you can make a point of seeing again and again this coming July 22nd 2017.

Together we are better than when we are alone or isolated. We can cultivate our sense of hopefulness in ourselves and each other by understanding we are all in this life together. Life's journey is made slightly more easy when we make the trip with others we know and mutually support.

Happy Holidays!

When Life Was Different.

Before we had all of our class reunions we first had to live some life. I won't say it was better, but it was harder, and difficulty yields character.

When it snowed we reveled in the drifts wearing multiple layers of clothing and sledded where ever we could find a hill. We shoveled the sidewalks of our neighbors for money, and our own home as a duty. I like to tell the story of how my Dad would have us shovel our sidewalk before he went to work in the morning. He took the train and usually walked down Glenwood Road to the Hohokus train station. If we pointed out that nobody else had shoveled their walks yet, we would be met with a glare which said, "Just do it!" 

When it snowed a great deal we listened on the radio for school closings. The radio stations would read them over and over, and we would listen until the good news of a day off was certain. A snow changed the tenor of an entire day. Books and homework were placed to the side and we would venture outside to see who else in the neighborhood was out playing around. Sometimes there were huge snowball fights that might last for hours and included building forts and stockpiling snowballs. It all would last for as long as it took us to get too cold or hungry to continue.

Now that we are older and far removed from the simple pleasures of a snow day, it makes me want to hold onto these memories even more. I can't have that same feeling again but I do find it reassuring to think about them. I can treasure the memories and be glad in being able to recall them. It's even better when I can do it in the company of friends who were there with me at the time.

Robots and Reunions

Robots will never replace High School Reunion organizers. Never!

Robots will replace many repetitive jobs in this country and around the world. Fortunately, the job of a reunion organizer is not a job slated for automation any time soon.

This post is not intended to make light of the huge number of jobs now being accomplished by robots or the millions of jobs robots which they could potentially do in the future. That is a serious issue which must be addressed by our society, but not in this post.

Our RHS Class of 1977 possesses a good number of people who at one time or another have been bitten by the bug to organize or be a part of a reunion committee. Next year's 40th reunion team leans heavily on all the efforts of previous reunions. If you are lucky that is how it falls and your reunions only grow better with time. The intangibles are what can be passed down through the years, another name for mistakes and successes. Robots can't pass on what they have learned as well as humans and in my lifetime probably never will.

Hope you are planning on making it to our BBQ next summer. Details will follow in the new year. Just mark down Saturday, July 22nd 2017 as the day we next gather as a class and marvel at how we have changed through the years. By a 40th reunion nobody truly kids anybody as to whether they look the same as they did in high school. Though we all can reflect upon what is different now, who we miss, and with any luck what our 45th reunion will be like.

Our 40th reunion will have feature (Rain of Shine) the original members of the band who played so well at our 35th reunion. We will also have a few surprises which we'll become public the sooner we get to the big day. You will not be disappointed!

Cost of Living in 1970

It would take me a while to try and remember each and every price quoted here. Though they are fun to ponder. I couldn't tell you what a postage stamp costs today because I rarely use them and they don't have the price on them, only the word, "Forever."

Henry David Thoreau

The first time you hear Thoreau quoted is usually when you are young and impressionable. This is not surprising since he lived just shy of 45 years and wrote many of his best works while young and impressionable himself.

I read and re-read Thoreau beginning at about the age of 25. He was in his late thirties when he completed writing his seminal work, Walden. In it he tells the story of his time living in solitude on a piece of land owned by his mentor Ralph Waldo Emerson in Concord, Massachusetts. Perusing his epic now I can hear in his words the wonder and impatience of youth. His questioning of societal attitudes and what it means to be alive provides me with guideposts even to this day. Gandhi and Martin Luther King credit Thoreau for helping them formulate their ideas on non-violent activism.

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away."

Yes, step to the beat which you hear. Life is too short to act in any other manner.

RHS Class of 1977 Network Effect

I am writing today about the lofty notion of consciously tapping the potential in our class. The aim is to make a lasting set of changes in our world. By this I mean a non-partisan effort which seeks to inspire and motivate positive actions and good deeds in each of our local communities. The end result would be a daily series of small efforts whose goal is to improve and build up, rather than criticize and nitpick.

Sounds incredibly simple and naive, right? Well, it actually is when you pause to give it some reflection. Though doesn't this sound familiar and like the kind of talk which used to be commonplace when we were growing up?

So put on your rose colored glasses for just a moment and let me propose we focus on reaching out to each other, be it in person, over the phone, or via the multitude of avenues which the Internet offers each of us. Use our 40th Class Reunion this coming summer as the reason for your actions.

The 40th reunion gives us all the perfect opportunity to compare notes, formulate ideas, and see what we could be doing together in the future. More reunions, of course. Though maybe we will come up with a solution or two to the problems we are seeing in our communities and the world today. There are no boundaries being set on your idealism.
  
Whether you want to call attention to your efforts or decide to keep the spotlight off you, the heart of the matter is being aware and understanding the essence of this philosophic idea.  

The best way to create the RHS Class of 1977 Network Effect is by being someone who encourages people to connect to each other and to help each other.

Go for it. Dare to be good.

New Web Site for our 40th Reunion!

Please check out:

https://www.maroonsonline.com

The ticket price and location will be announced in January.

We are getting the band back together.

This ought to be good! Stay tuned.

Ridgewood, NJ "In Memory Of"

I started a new blog today with all the best intentions of any new project. It has plenty of mistakes, and those I accept and will correct. The information comes from the forum I created on Facebook dedicated to the memories of classmates, teachers, administrators, and RHS employees.

The responses to the Facebook forum were very moving and I thought the idea ought to be transferred to the part of the Internet not behind the gates of Social Media. In other words, a simple search will find the site for you, without having to be part of Facebook.

 http://ridgewoodinmemoryof.blogspot.com/

My favorite response to the In Memory Of site came from Jack Zerbe:

"I think our lost friends represent lives fulfilled. Even though some of these wonderful people left without a proper farewell, that they live on in our hearts and minds shows that they made a difference in many peoples lives. Our comments now are a delayed tribute."

40 Thanksgivings Ago

40 years ago on Thanksgiving I was a Senior at Ridgewood High School. I attended what was then the traditional Thanksgiving Day Football game against the team from Fairlawn, NJ. Funny how things change. I haven't watched tackle football in years and feel sorry in a way for those who still find meaning in this brutalizing amusement. Bread and Circuses is what the Romans used to call these type of festivities.

40 years ago a band call The Band gave their farewell performance in San Francisco. They had been a hard touring group and they decided, as so few do, to leave on their own terms. They filmed it and invited all their friends in the industry. It turned out to be quite a film with a young Martin Scorsese providing the direction.















40 years ago we also had a new President getting ready to take office. This one was named Jimmy Carter. Fine man, less than memorable President. He is still active building homes for people who can't afford to do it themselves, even after he was diagnosed with cancer.

40 years ago a company I had never heard of, named Apple Computer, was formed. Now I am thoroughly enmeshed in the Apple ecosystem of computers and phones. We talked more when we didn't have these devices. We still communicate but we don't peer into each others eyes quite as much.

40 years ago I lived in a suburb of New York City. Today that same village still has fine public schools, but the barriers to entry and living in the village are now extremely high. I would imagine very few teachers in the school system can afford to live in the village, same for Postal Workers, and most other "good" middle class jobs. The town used to retain a middle class feel with only a few wealthier families, who didn't make as big a deal of their possessions, in order that they might fit in with everyone else. Today, they seem to want to flaunt their purchases in the vain attempt to distinguish their lifestyles and distance themselves from their neighbors. They also seem to spend time trying to convince themselves they earned everything their own by their own hard work. Truth be told they mostly inherited their money or had a relative show them how to game the real estate market and tax laws. No matter how much they drink they can never forget this, or the other truth that possessions don't make the person, only one's character can do perform that feat.

40 years ago I was working on College applications. My parents had saved the grand sum of $40,000 for each of their three sons so we could attend college and not have to take out loans. Today that same amount of money buys you much less. Most kids leave school with a ruinous amount of debt and one question, "Why did I let my parents and peers convince me that higher education was a good idea?"

40 years ago the movie, "Miracle on 34th Street" and the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade ushered in the holiday season. Now we watch what we want when we want. The old television watching habits are now called "Linear TV" and "Appointment TV." These are truly things of the past, but still seem quaint and reassuring if you are feeling nostalgic.

Happy Thanksgiving! Hope you do what we did 40 years ago and eat some turkey with your family.